top of page

How to fight off mannequins

in 3 easy ways!

You find yourself getting choked by a mannequin. 

What do you do? How do you react?

Here is a simple guide on how to go from foes to friends.


1. Fight back

​Crucial to this encounter is not letting yourself get strangled. Fight off your opponent and prove to them you can defend yourself. Realizing that you were a worthy opponent, they'll eventually release you from the grip of death.​

2. Become friends

​Now that the mannequin has released you and your oxygen level are back to normal, you can relax. Crack some jokes to loosen up the tension. Be careful not to get too political. Soon enough, you'll have established a solid ground for a long-lasting friendship with inanimate objects. Good job!

3. Privacy First

Remember to keep it humble. Too much attention could ruin this new friendship. Instead of getting overwhelmed by excitement and taking selfies, enjoy the moment and have a friendly chat. Don't let others document your unique moment! Friendship and privacy first. 

a foolproof guide by Emma Loria

This article isn't real. Nothing is real.

bottom of page